Saturday, February 17, 2018

Cow Cackles

What do you call a cow with 4 legs?
A cow

What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
Tri-Tip

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean Beef

What do you call a cow with 1 leg?
Steak

What do you call a cow with 0 legs?
Ground Beef

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Sunday Snickers

What did the grape say when it was stepped on?
It let out a little WINE

What did the 0 say to the 8?
Hey, nice belt!

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Puns Everyone Should Know

Why was the students homework wet?
It was below C level.

Why was the tomato red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.

What is Bruce Lee's favorite drink?
Wataaaaaah!

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Cringe-Worthy Jokes

1. What do you do with a dead chemist?
A: Bari-um

2. Knock knock
Who's there
Ya
Ya who?
Yahooooo!

3. What did silver say to gold?
A-U!

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Mad Cow Disease

Two cows are sitting in a field.
One turns to the other and says "Man, have you heard about that mad cow disease? It seems pretty scary, I hope I don't catch it."
The other looks back and says "I don't care, I'm a helicopter!"

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Anti-Jokes

Honestly, I've never really understood the appeal of this form of dark humor, but here are a few anti-jokes to  brighten your day.

Sally
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.

Knock knock,
Who's there?
Not Sally.


Mailman
How do you make a mailman cry?
Kill his family.


Baby
What's red and flies?
A baby in a blender.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Bloody Bats

I love this joke too!

There are three vampire bats hiding in a cave surrounded by three castles. One night, they decided to have a blood-drinking contest.
The first bat went and came back with blood dripping from his fangs. The other two were amazed.
"Whoa!" Said a bat "How many peoples blood did you drink?"
"You see that castle over there?" The first bat pointed to one of the castles. the other two bats nodded "I drank blood from three people there."
The next night, the second bat went out and came back with his face covered in blood.
"See that castle over there?" She said to their bewildered expressions. "I drank blood from 5 people.
The next night, the last bat went out and came back, his whole body covered in blood.
"How much blood did you drink?"
"See that castle over there? Well, I didn't!"